Tuesday, November 9, 2010
A Photo Story
We hired a doula for our birth, and we got SO much more!! Patti Ramos was not only a support and encouragement in the tough weeks leading up to the birth, but an amazing stronghold and advocate during the birth itself! AND the icing on the cake? She's a professional photographer who happens to take breathtaking photos that truly capture the amazing and beautiful process of giving birth! We were fortunate enough to have her there with us telling a story of how Eli came to be through photos! I've chosen a few of my favorites to share! Please be aware that it was a water birth, so view at your own discretion (everything is decent, don't worry!). All photos Copyright - Patti Ramos 2010. Enjoy!! :)
Brit Milah!
So, I'm finally trying my hand at blogging (it's actually kind of intimidating when you think about it...pouring your heart and mind out for everyone to read, and hoping it will be entertaining enough to capture their attention) - please be gracious! First of all, I just want to thank everyone for their kind thoughts and prayers throughout the whole process of bringing Eli into this world. He is such a testimony for so many reasons - from the way God protected the pregnancy after a painful miscarriage, to an AMAZING uncomplicated, quick, and beautiful water birth the way we envisioned, to a supernaturally fast and easy recovery, to the blessing of this little baby's calm spirit. We truly believe that the Holy Spirit has been present and active since day one of Eli's life, and give God all the glory for how everything went down! Mind you, we have tough days and frustrating moments in the middle of the night, but God says,
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. -James 1:5
...and believe me, we ask! Every day!
Today was Eli's circumcision (Brit Milah literally means "the covenant of circumcision"), and even though it's commonly done throughout the United States today, I was really curious about its origins. If ya'll know me at all, that means it's time for some RESEARCH!! Coming from a Judeo-Christian background, I knew that the Old Testament describes it as a physical symbol of the covenant between God and His people. But what does that mean?? And what about the other times it talks about circumcision in the Bible?
In Genesis 17:9-11, God institutes circumcision for His people, and literally describes the cutting off of the foreskin as a token of His covenant with Abraham (to increase and bless the nation of Israel). Any male in a Jewish household was commanded to be circumcised, and this was also accompanied by a Jewish naming ceremony. One thing I found really interesting is that God specifies to wait 8 days until after a baby is born to perform the ceremony. Did you know that it takes about 8 days for a newborn's blood to start clotting appropriately? The liver requires Vitamin K to synthesize key clotting factors, but the gut isn't colonized with Vitamin K -producing bacteria until the baby is about 8 days old!! HOW COOL IS THAT?!?!? I love when science so clearly supports Biblical law! I'm such a nerd.
Later in Joshua 5:2-7, Joshua performs the circumcision rite on his people at Gilgal after God dries up the Jordan river, allowing them to cross. It's a reminder of God's PROTECTION. It's also done a second time after 40 years in the wilderness without observance (the people had been disobedient and were cut off from the land). This time it's followed by eating fruit of the land (instead of manna, which was the only thing available for 40 years), signifying God's PROVISION.
There are many accounts of circumcision in the flesh, but the Bible also discusses "circumcision of the heart," which basically means purity of the heart. Deut 10:16 commands us to circumcise the foreskins of our hearts and be no longer stiffnecked. Later God promises to circumcise the hearts of His people when He gathers them to the promised land (30:5-6), in order that they might love God with all their heart, love Him with all their soul, and in order that they might live. The term "circumcision" means so much more than a physical procedure; it implies a purity of heart that results from "putting off" superfluous and ungodly attitudes. (Romans 5:28-29, Colossians 2:11, Philippians 3:3, Galations 5:2-6, Jeremiah 6:10, Exodus 6:12)
SO! Now that we have a better concept of circumcision, Jake and I decided to have a Bris-style blessing ceremony for Eli (but much more casual) as a way to recognize and celebrate our son's identity in God's covenant. We prayed over him before and during the procedure, and my mom stepped in as the Kvatterin (an honored person, often childless, who hands the baby to the person performing the rite). It was actually amazing to watch them perform the procedure - Eli looked right into our eyes calmly (laying on the red knit blanket that his auntie JJ knit for him), and didn't even cry! We ended the day with a Seudat Mitzvah (celebratory meal), during which we recited many of the blessings from the traditional Bris ceremony. Following are some of the blessings that I, Jake, and my mom took turns praying over Eli. He's been very peaceful since his circumcision, and we attribute all of that to God's protection. What a blessed day!
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who has sanctified us with His commandments and commanded us concerning circumcision.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who has sanctified us with His commandments and commanded us to enter him into the Covenant of Abraham our father
Just as he has entered into the Covenant, so may he enter into Torah, into marriage, and into good deeds.
And the Lord spoke to Moses, saying: "Speak to Aaron and to his sons, saying, Thus shall you bless the children of Israel, say to them: "The Lord bless you and guard you. The Lord make His countenance shine upon you and be gracious to you. The Lord turn His countenance toward you and grant you peace." And they shall set My name upon the children of Israel, and I shall bless them.'"
The rest can be found at: http://www.circumcision.net/Bris_Ceremony.htm
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. -James 1:5
...and believe me, we ask! Every day!
Today was Eli's circumcision (Brit Milah literally means "the covenant of circumcision"), and even though it's commonly done throughout the United States today, I was really curious about its origins. If ya'll know me at all, that means it's time for some RESEARCH!! Coming from a Judeo-Christian background, I knew that the Old Testament describes it as a physical symbol of the covenant between God and His people. But what does that mean?? And what about the other times it talks about circumcision in the Bible?
In Genesis 17:9-11, God institutes circumcision for His people, and literally describes the cutting off of the foreskin as a token of His covenant with Abraham (to increase and bless the nation of Israel). Any male in a Jewish household was commanded to be circumcised, and this was also accompanied by a Jewish naming ceremony. One thing I found really interesting is that God specifies to wait 8 days until after a baby is born to perform the ceremony. Did you know that it takes about 8 days for a newborn's blood to start clotting appropriately? The liver requires Vitamin K to synthesize key clotting factors, but the gut isn't colonized with Vitamin K -producing bacteria until the baby is about 8 days old!! HOW COOL IS THAT?!?!? I love when science so clearly supports Biblical law! I'm such a nerd.
Later in Joshua 5:2-7, Joshua performs the circumcision rite on his people at Gilgal after God dries up the Jordan river, allowing them to cross. It's a reminder of God's PROTECTION. It's also done a second time after 40 years in the wilderness without observance (the people had been disobedient and were cut off from the land). This time it's followed by eating fruit of the land (instead of manna, which was the only thing available for 40 years), signifying God's PROVISION.
There are many accounts of circumcision in the flesh, but the Bible also discusses "circumcision of the heart," which basically means purity of the heart. Deut 10:16 commands us to circumcise the foreskins of our hearts and be no longer stiffnecked. Later God promises to circumcise the hearts of His people when He gathers them to the promised land (30:5-6), in order that they might love God with all their heart, love Him with all their soul, and in order that they might live. The term "circumcision" means so much more than a physical procedure; it implies a purity of heart that results from "putting off" superfluous and ungodly attitudes. (Romans 5:28-29, Colossians 2:11, Philippians 3:3, Galations 5:2-6, Jeremiah 6:10, Exodus 6:12)
SO! Now that we have a better concept of circumcision, Jake and I decided to have a Bris-style blessing ceremony for Eli (but much more casual) as a way to recognize and celebrate our son's identity in God's covenant. We prayed over him before and during the procedure, and my mom stepped in as the Kvatterin (an honored person, often childless, who hands the baby to the person performing the rite). It was actually amazing to watch them perform the procedure - Eli looked right into our eyes calmly (laying on the red knit blanket that his auntie JJ knit for him), and didn't even cry! We ended the day with a Seudat Mitzvah (celebratory meal), during which we recited many of the blessings from the traditional Bris ceremony. Following are some of the blessings that I, Jake, and my mom took turns praying over Eli. He's been very peaceful since his circumcision, and we attribute all of that to God's protection. What a blessed day!
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who has sanctified us with His commandments and commanded us concerning circumcision.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who has sanctified us with His commandments and commanded us to enter him into the Covenant of Abraham our father
Just as he has entered into the Covenant, so may he enter into Torah, into marriage, and into good deeds.
And the Lord spoke to Moses, saying: "Speak to Aaron and to his sons, saying, Thus shall you bless the children of Israel, say to them: "The Lord bless you and guard you. The Lord make His countenance shine upon you and be gracious to you. The Lord turn His countenance toward you and grant you peace." And they shall set My name upon the children of Israel, and I shall bless them.'"
The rest can be found at: http://www.circumcision.net/Bris_Ceremony.htm
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
The Testimony of Eli
Many of you may know that my son, Robert Eli Bollinger was born five days ago. What you may not know is what a testimony his birth was. Unlike me, Sarah has been a long time proponent of the advantages of a natural birth. It took me a while to come around, but with some lessons from a new friend, I began to see that a natural birth was not just about the medical advantages. It was about the the accomplishment and the willpower of a mother. It's like pushing yourself to climb a mountain, when you know you could just hop on a train to get to the top. And its about the power of prayer and the support of family to get you there.
First of all, I would like to say that I am so proud of Sarah and how strong she has been through this whole process. Her fortitude speaks volumes for the type of mother that she is going to be. But even in the beginning she said that she doesn't want this to be about just her. She wants this to be about God, how he provides, and how he makes all things possible.
More than two weeks ago was when Sarah's labor began. It was not an intense active labor, but something more difficult called prodromal labor. This means different things for many women, but for Sarah it meant that she didn't have intense pain, just a long exhausting kind of pain that would intensify for six to twelve hour periods, but never enough to push her into active labor. In one particular instance, after a very difficult sleepless night, we took Sarah in to be checked, only to find that her dilation had actually reversed. During this process we were in constant prayer. We prayed for relief from the aches and pains, we prayed for Eli to arrive quickly, and we prayed for a quick delivery.
Eventually the days of prodromal labor turned into weeks, Sarah's due date came and went, and her frustration only increased. We had to begin to talk about induction and other means of intervention, and this was not what Sarah and I wanted. Eventually we set the date for the induction, but we continued to pray every day that this could happen naturally. Several days after her due date, I began to think maybe God wasn't going to answer our prayers. I began to think about how God doesn't always give us what we want, and that perhaps there was a reason we needed to submit to His way instead of our way. But the reality was, that I had given up hope, and I was preparing myself for the let down.
On Friday night, Sarah and I were relaxing around the house, trying to decide what to do with another long weekend of waiting, when suddenly something changed. At about 11:00pm, Sarah's water broke and our hopes jumped. This meant something was going to happen, natural or not he would be here soon. But for Sarah, her labor had not changed much, she was still feeling the same prodromal labor she had been experiencing for weeks. After a quick call to the midwife and doula, we decided to stay home. It could be over 24 hours before labor started, so we would wait and see if things progressed in the next twelve hours before checking in to the hospital. Sarah and I spent the next hour timing contractions, but for the most part things did not appear to have changed. She recommended I sleep, and she would try to if she could.
But for Sarah something had already changed, and she did not sleep. Less than two hours later, at about 2:30am, she woke me up and let me know her labor was getting more difficult. It was still not too unbearable for her, but I have a very strong wife. For about the next hour we spent some time trying the techniques we learned in our birthing class, to see if I could relieve any of her discomfort, but things where getting steadily more difficult.
At about 3:00am Sarah decided to call our doula. She didn't think her labor pains were too difficult, but she was beginning to worry about the car ride. Sitting had become very uncomfortable, so she wanted to make the trip before her contractions became too difficult. Our doula and I encouraged her to wait as long as possible, but Sarah decided she wanted to go anyway. And her instincts paid off.
At about 3:30am Sarah and I left for the hospital, and arranged for our doula to meet us there at about 4:15. We knew that labor would be long and difficult, so we were not in much of a hurry. As we drove, Sarah remained calm, listening to her ipod and squeezing my hand as difficult contractions passed. But halfway to the hospital her contractions continued to intensify. She remained strong and complained little, emphasizing her breathing, and using long monotone vocalizations to dull out the pain. At this point Sarah had an inkling that she might have progressed pretty far, but she didn't want to get her hopes up, and she was fully prepared to arrive with a report of 4cm and a long morning ahead of her.
Arriving at the hospital was the most difficult part of the whole process. We told them Sarah's water had been broken for several hours, and that the contractions were starting to get very strong and close, but the intake through the ER was still unbearably slow. I suppose they see many laboring first time mothers, who believe they are much further a long than they are. But they don't know how strong my wife is.
After about 15 minutes of waiting for Sarah to get entered into the system, and for someone to take us up to labor and delivery, we finally made it upstairs. But the waiting wasn't over yet. For Sarah things were getting much more intense, and the pain relief techniques I learned were really starting to pay off. Sarah was beginning to feel strong discomfort and a urgency to push. So she asked me to go look for a nurse. Three times I left the room to let the nurse know how intense things were, but she continued to reassure me that "she could hear Sarah" and "she only had a few more things to enter into the computer before she would be in".
Finally by about 4:10am, the labor and delivery nurse came in to check on Sarah. It's normal hospital procedure to hook up a baby for about 20 minutes of monitoring, and for the nurse to check a mother's dilation when they arrive. The heart rate monitor went on first, and everything looked fine. Then she asked Sarah to try to lay back even though she new it was uncomfortable. Sarah used a short break in between contractions to lay down. Once the nurse had checked her she looked at Sarah and said "alright were having a baby." Sarah in turn asked, "How far am I?" And the Nurse responded, "You are complete and at a plus two station." And she began preparing Sarah for transfer to the birthing room.
Everything from this point on went exactly how Sarah and I had prayed for. Our doula arrived and she was a great support, and a much needed advocate. The birth was a water birth, and in less than 15 minutes of pushing, Eli was here. Born 7lbs 2oz at 5:04am. It was an absolutely unbelievable process. My son was born into a wonderful calm environment, with no medication and no intervention. He cried briefly to let us know that he was breathing, but then for the remainder of the morning he was calm, content, and alert.
Earlier this summer our Pastor gave a sermon that I call the "Yes, No, Wait" sermon. During this sermon, he told us that God had three responses to our prayers "Yes," "No," or "Wait." Eli's birth was what we had hoped for, it was a testimony to the power of prayer. And an example of how the love, support, and prayers of family could transform such a frightening process into something beautiful that glorifies God. But it was also a lesson for Sarah and I about "Yes, No, Wait." We both wanted Eli's birth to be a testimony, and we couldn't understand why God wasn't answering our prayers. Why would he want us to have a induction when things could be so perfect? As things came down to the line, we began to lose hope, but God had other plans. We needed to just need to learn to be patient and that sometimes God answers our prayers with "wait." And let me tell you, it was worth the wait.
First of all, I would like to say that I am so proud of Sarah and how strong she has been through this whole process. Her fortitude speaks volumes for the type of mother that she is going to be. But even in the beginning she said that she doesn't want this to be about just her. She wants this to be about God, how he provides, and how he makes all things possible.
More than two weeks ago was when Sarah's labor began. It was not an intense active labor, but something more difficult called prodromal labor. This means different things for many women, but for Sarah it meant that she didn't have intense pain, just a long exhausting kind of pain that would intensify for six to twelve hour periods, but never enough to push her into active labor. In one particular instance, after a very difficult sleepless night, we took Sarah in to be checked, only to find that her dilation had actually reversed. During this process we were in constant prayer. We prayed for relief from the aches and pains, we prayed for Eli to arrive quickly, and we prayed for a quick delivery.
Eventually the days of prodromal labor turned into weeks, Sarah's due date came and went, and her frustration only increased. We had to begin to talk about induction and other means of intervention, and this was not what Sarah and I wanted. Eventually we set the date for the induction, but we continued to pray every day that this could happen naturally. Several days after her due date, I began to think maybe God wasn't going to answer our prayers. I began to think about how God doesn't always give us what we want, and that perhaps there was a reason we needed to submit to His way instead of our way. But the reality was, that I had given up hope, and I was preparing myself for the let down.
On Friday night, Sarah and I were relaxing around the house, trying to decide what to do with another long weekend of waiting, when suddenly something changed. At about 11:00pm, Sarah's water broke and our hopes jumped. This meant something was going to happen, natural or not he would be here soon. But for Sarah, her labor had not changed much, she was still feeling the same prodromal labor she had been experiencing for weeks. After a quick call to the midwife and doula, we decided to stay home. It could be over 24 hours before labor started, so we would wait and see if things progressed in the next twelve hours before checking in to the hospital. Sarah and I spent the next hour timing contractions, but for the most part things did not appear to have changed. She recommended I sleep, and she would try to if she could.
But for Sarah something had already changed, and she did not sleep. Less than two hours later, at about 2:30am, she woke me up and let me know her labor was getting more difficult. It was still not too unbearable for her, but I have a very strong wife. For about the next hour we spent some time trying the techniques we learned in our birthing class, to see if I could relieve any of her discomfort, but things where getting steadily more difficult.
At about 3:00am Sarah decided to call our doula. She didn't think her labor pains were too difficult, but she was beginning to worry about the car ride. Sitting had become very uncomfortable, so she wanted to make the trip before her contractions became too difficult. Our doula and I encouraged her to wait as long as possible, but Sarah decided she wanted to go anyway. And her instincts paid off.
At about 3:30am Sarah and I left for the hospital, and arranged for our doula to meet us there at about 4:15. We knew that labor would be long and difficult, so we were not in much of a hurry. As we drove, Sarah remained calm, listening to her ipod and squeezing my hand as difficult contractions passed. But halfway to the hospital her contractions continued to intensify. She remained strong and complained little, emphasizing her breathing, and using long monotone vocalizations to dull out the pain. At this point Sarah had an inkling that she might have progressed pretty far, but she didn't want to get her hopes up, and she was fully prepared to arrive with a report of 4cm and a long morning ahead of her.
Arriving at the hospital was the most difficult part of the whole process. We told them Sarah's water had been broken for several hours, and that the contractions were starting to get very strong and close, but the intake through the ER was still unbearably slow. I suppose they see many laboring first time mothers, who believe they are much further a long than they are. But they don't know how strong my wife is.
After about 15 minutes of waiting for Sarah to get entered into the system, and for someone to take us up to labor and delivery, we finally made it upstairs. But the waiting wasn't over yet. For Sarah things were getting much more intense, and the pain relief techniques I learned were really starting to pay off. Sarah was beginning to feel strong discomfort and a urgency to push. So she asked me to go look for a nurse. Three times I left the room to let the nurse know how intense things were, but she continued to reassure me that "she could hear Sarah" and "she only had a few more things to enter into the computer before she would be in".
Finally by about 4:10am, the labor and delivery nurse came in to check on Sarah. It's normal hospital procedure to hook up a baby for about 20 minutes of monitoring, and for the nurse to check a mother's dilation when they arrive. The heart rate monitor went on first, and everything looked fine. Then she asked Sarah to try to lay back even though she new it was uncomfortable. Sarah used a short break in between contractions to lay down. Once the nurse had checked her she looked at Sarah and said "alright were having a baby." Sarah in turn asked, "How far am I?" And the Nurse responded, "You are complete and at a plus two station." And she began preparing Sarah for transfer to the birthing room.
Everything from this point on went exactly how Sarah and I had prayed for. Our doula arrived and she was a great support, and a much needed advocate. The birth was a water birth, and in less than 15 minutes of pushing, Eli was here. Born 7lbs 2oz at 5:04am. It was an absolutely unbelievable process. My son was born into a wonderful calm environment, with no medication and no intervention. He cried briefly to let us know that he was breathing, but then for the remainder of the morning he was calm, content, and alert.
Earlier this summer our Pastor gave a sermon that I call the "Yes, No, Wait" sermon. During this sermon, he told us that God had three responses to our prayers "Yes," "No," or "Wait." Eli's birth was what we had hoped for, it was a testimony to the power of prayer. And an example of how the love, support, and prayers of family could transform such a frightening process into something beautiful that glorifies God. But it was also a lesson for Sarah and I about "Yes, No, Wait." We both wanted Eli's birth to be a testimony, and we couldn't understand why God wasn't answering our prayers. Why would he want us to have a induction when things could be so perfect? As things came down to the line, we began to lose hope, but God had other plans. We needed to just need to learn to be patient and that sometimes God answers our prayers with "wait." And let me tell you, it was worth the wait.
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